Tag:Government
Posted on: April 14, 2011 2:48 pm
 

Now the Government is involved

Now the Government is trying to decide how to run the NFL I await with interest at how ridiculous the results will become. Using Federal logic, teams will be able to borrow wins from future years so they can compete today. First into the hat will be the Detroit Lions who plan on using wins from the next 11 seasons to amass a 12-4 record this year. This years losses will be blamed upon previous years mistakes and will then not count.

Look for teams to go 16-0 (or 18-0) just to annoy the 72 Dolphins and give TV announcers something to talk about. Don't worry, the Patriots will still lose the Superbowl.

I also look for 11th hour standoffs between the AFC and NFC regarding scheduling with one side demanding that points scored at the end of the game are shared equally amongst all participants to ensure that all teams share the sacrifice of having to win and lose.

Large signing bonuses will be a thing of the past as fans will protest at stadia all around the country if overpaid players don't perform. Look for fans to ask for refunds on PSLs, beer and everything else they bought on credit during the run up to yet another failed Suprebowl attempt.

The biggest changes will come from the way offense and defense interact. In keeping with the way the Libyan conflict has been handled, look for offensive coordinators and quarterbacks to solicit as much input as they can before calling plays. Whether this involves polling the practice squad players (the NFL equivalent of Turkey) or possibly some other teams entirely is open to questions. As delay of game penalties stack up, look for inflationary pressures on the four down system with proposals to raise the "down ceiling" to at least 6 or 8 before the end of the year. Whether the yard can hold up as the standard unit of distance is open as well. There may be a move to incorporate the meter as the standard unit, allowing for a 1st and 9.144 to become a 2nd 13.716 after a 4.572m penalty for a false start.

This blog post has rambled for which I apologize. It was supposed to be a serious comment on the 18 game season, but went off track.

Category: NFL
 
 
 
 
The views expressed in this blog are solely those of the author and do not reflect the views of CBS Sports or CBSSports.com